Diptic

Big in Japan: Baseball’s Opening Day

IMG_0537IMG_0541Arigato Lola Sports Talk reader San.

Welcome to the Tokyo Dome. It’s the home of defending Champion Tokyo Giants. As we all know, baseball is (wait for it)… big in Japan, so the defending champs home opener is about as big as it gets in the Land of the Rising Sun.

The Tokyo Dome is situated in northern Tokyo. It’s perched atop an elevated platform and is flanked by a full on amusement park, Michael Jackson style. It was built in 1988 and has housed an incredible array of events ever since.

I went with my friend Emmett, who one time in Little League beaned my younger brother while my Dad was in the crowd.

IMG_0543

IMG_0548Yankees fans remember “Godzilla”, Hideki Matsui. Prior to being a huge part in their 2009 World Series victory, he was the face of the Giants (who are coincidentally, the Yankees of Japan).

Since it’s opening night, I’m sure he is tucked away in a skybox watching.

IMG_0561

2012 Champs.

IMG_0572Today’s opponent was the Hiroshima Carp. Their merch is about as cute and anime-y as you could expect from Japan.
IMG_0549

IMG_0554The Giants mascot is apparently an anime rabbit. Maybe something was lost in translation?

IMG_0596Because it was Japan, you are expecting everything to be futuristic, but the stadium was rather antiquated. This place is 25 years old and has dingy ceilings, it kind of had that Georgia Dome vibe.

IMG_0575

They had an older gentleman, who I’m sure is famous here, throw out the first pitch. He was dressed in some form of traditional Japanese garb. IMG_0576

He ended up throwing out the worst first pitch this side of Carl Lewis.

IMG_0579IMG_0581

IMG_0594The entire left field was a Carp supporter section (fans in red) while the rest of the outfield was Giants fans (in orange). They would battle back and forth with chants and noisemakers. The infield seemed to be the quiet family section.

Also, doesn’t that look just like a Japanese Bill O’Reilly on the second photo?

IMG_0590Not trying to be all Brent Musburger, but really pretty female beer girls cruised the stadium with kegs on their back, dispensing fresh suds right at your seat. At Jets games the beer man is a thugged out guy with tattoos on his neck and forearm. Advantage Japan.

IMG_0560

I couldn’t contain my excitement to try Japanese stadium food and I exploded out of my seat in my pursuit of rating foreign stadium nourishment.

IMG_0609No idea what this stuff is.

IMG_0615IMG_0613The crepes smelled amazing.

IMG_0602IMG_0603I’m not sure if this is made of bread or jerky, but it’s a life sized baseball bat made of food.

IMG_0649IMG_0639IMG_0642The line at Gindaco drew me to it. The only think they served was takuyaki. It’s a piece of octopus, put in a kind of pancake dough. It’s then fried into a ball (the dough on the inside is still raw) and topped with (for lack of a better word) stuff.

IMG_0648As a huge octopus fan that had seen this on Travel Channel shows, I was very excited to try. A little too excited as my mouth was scorched with molten batter as I immediately hustled one into my mouth. After the initial shock I was able to enjoy the small piece of tasty octopus. I wish they had way more octopus in them, stop being stingy.

IMG_0618Everyone neatly stacks their trash. #Japan

IMG_0622IMG_0628In the standing room only section people took off their shoes.

IMG_0566The smoking section.

IMG_0570Here’s a mascot that Americans are familiar with, Colonel Sanders. There’s apparently a Curse of Colonel Sanders in Japan. Hanshin Tigers fans threw a Colonel Sanders statue into a river during the celebration of their teams first (and now only ) league win. The Colonel was displeased and according to legend hexed the team. They will not win a league title again until the statue is retrieved from the river. So far the curse has held true.

IMG_0682When you use a bathroom here, you can be pretty sure that George Michael did something skeevy in it back in 1991.

IMG_0685USA!

IMG_0697IMG_0693People can argue Michael Jackson vs Prince, but the Tokyo Dome got the best of both worlds.

IMG_0690IMG_0699Everyone knows about Mike Tyson losing to Buster Douglas here, but did you know he mopped up Tony Tabbs in two rounds in ’88.

Basically, if you were a kid in the late 1980′s and early 1990′s, someone you liked a lot came through this building at some point.

IMG_0651IMG_0660IMG_0661I checked into the Carp section just as they were scoring a run to take the lead. The fans were ecstatic.

IMG_0636IMG_0711IMG_0582Here we see ex MLB player Fred Lewis, one of the Carps Americans. I vividly remember watching the movie “Mr Baseball“. The culture clash, the different view on sports and the hot foreign women were emblazoned into my nine year old brain who already had interests in sports and travel. 21 years later, here I am, watching the team that Tom Selleck team in the end of the movie (the Giants), this is awesome.

IMG_0640IMG_0779Here’s what the mayonaise chicken (fried chicken, lightly poached egg, pepper mayonaise, dry seaweed over steamed rice) is supposed to look like, and here’s what it actually looks like. It was kind of gnarly because the egg was pretty cold (so was the chicken now that I think about it), but at least the what it was supposed to look like looks delicious.

IMG_0736IMG_0741One of the downsides of being a beer girl is that your knees get dirty.

IMG_0742IMG_0774The coolest part about Japan is how well everyone dresses. They put a ton of time and thought into their every look. Well except for this guy with the graphics on the front of his jeans. Go back to Vegas with that.

IMG_0748 IMG_0747IMG_0755IMG_0757I checked into the Giants fan section just in time to see them take the lead for good. I’m like the anti Colonel Sanders in Japan, when I show up in your cheering section, runs are scored.

IMG_0769IMG_0770I was only in Japan for 5 days, but older Japanese people were not too friendly on the street. At the game was a different story as people were hugging me and being friendly as all hell. Sports is a language of togetherness (or division) around the World. It’s even strong enough to get the Japanese to bend the rigidness towards foreigners that their culture can be known for at time.

IMG_0727IMG_0732

Screen Shot 2013-05-19 at 9.51.58 AM(Actual top view of the Tokyo Dome)
IMG_0733They sell and ice cream version of their stadium. Now we all know what it’s like to be Godzilla.

IMG_0680IMG_0791The Giants would go on to win, they picked up where they left off, winning. It was really cool to see a culture on the other side of the World take something as American as baseball and make it their own. I’m glad I got marginally clo

Look for a photo essay from a rugby match in Tokyo (7′s) coming up and this Saturday I’m going to Yankees Stadium to watch the Champions League Finals (GO BAYERN!) on the big screen and then Chelsea vs Man City on the pitch.

Follow me on Twitter

Screen Shot 2013-05-18 at 2.14.29 PM

Actually Going to a Marlins Game

mi2ciMiami. The place where two years ago I launched LolaSportsTalk.com with a post that is no longer visible because foreign hackers hacked my site and I had to start from scratch and it’s going to take me forever to upload them all again. This is ofcourse after my camera was stolen from my car on my drive down, so all these photos are from my iPhone.

As you can see it’s been a long, winding road, but “now we here”. Specifically here to check out the highly controversial Marlins Park.

Miami taxpayers were apparently hoodwinked by the evil Jeffrey Loria, who took them to the cleaners to the point where it might drive the Dolphins out of town. Now there’s a highy controversial, empty, ballpark that drives away businesses.

Now this I had to see.

IMG_9032

IMG_9034I went to the game with my childhood buddy Blake and Tony, a Jets and Marlins superfan that I met on twitter.

We parked on the roof of the 3rd base garage and started tailgating. I think this is a niche niche but we did it anyway because we were literally the only cars on the roof.

IMG_9038Screen Shot 2013-05-18 at 12.36.19 PMThe $10 grill roared as we had some sausages, escargot and steak. The appetizer was some yellow tail snapper ceviche made from fish I caught the day before. #SouthFloridaLifetstyle

IMG_9036

On the way in I saw a guy repping a Tebow jersey, I explained my situation and we exchanged condolences. Let’s just say that when the rapture comes, him and I have first class seats out of here.

IMG_9042Local nightclub The Clevelander is represented here. “This is where we’re going after the game, it’s free and everyone goes there to party afterwards for two hours”.

IMG_9044Stadium employees. I’m working on my photo essay from Japanese baseball’s opening night, I will get deep into the differences between their stadium employees in depth, I promise you.

(updated: here you go)

IMG_9045IMG_9048I hate when stadiums try to be all grafitti and hip. I thought The Simpsons tackled this with the Poochie the Dog episode.

This is a hundred of million dollar stadium, why are you trying to make it look like under and overpass. It’s like Chris Brown grafitti’ing up his mansion, chill out.

 IMG_9049IMG_9051The outfield had an amazing view of the Miami skyline. The only way this view could be more Miami to mewould be if a helicopter flew over and threw out Omar Suarez. And I mean that in a good way.

Even when the roof is closed (which is often according to Tony), you can still look out and see the city.

IMG_9096

IMG_9080IMG_9081IMG_9093While circling the food stands, nothing really stood out to me, but in fairness to the stadium, I didn’t check out the “Taste of Miami” section. I’m sure it was tastier than normal stadium food (Levy Restaurants > > Aramark). I was pleased with my decision to cook on the garage roof.

IMG_9078

They should make this more realistic and have tattoos on the hands.

IMG_9066The sideline reporter is hotter than Toronto Mayor Rob Fords crack pipe.

IMG_9076For a while we sat at a bar in the outfield, we had the whole thing to ourselves and a spectacular view. People hate on this place because it’s empty but for me thats one of its strongest qualities. I love having the place to myself, I’m not having to squeeze past people or overhear bad conversations. Here, the stadium is your oyster.

IMG_9091Tony kept talking about “Stanton” and finally I was like “who’s Stanton” and he was like “our most well known player”.

I don’t claim to be Buster Olney, My baseball interests are “did the Red Sox lose?”. The only player I recognized was Juan Pierre and only because the “I used to run base like Juan Pierre” line.

IMG_9085Marlins Park has had some of the worst art this side of Cablevision Arena. They’re run by Michael Jordan, whats this place’s excuse?

IMG_9083

Pacifico is one of my favorite beers, nice to see it on tap here.

IMG_9100I went to get the obligatory shot from the empty upper decks. This place is emptier than the stadium of a European soccer team with racist fans.

Once again, that’s the glass half empty view. My thinking is it’s pretty awesome to have an entire section to yourself. We just kicked it up here and sipped out buzzer beating 7th inning stretch beers and talked Jets .

As the game wound down, we headed to the Clevelander for the afterparty. I’m pretty sure the Marlins lost by a lot.

IMG_9108IMG_9153

Ok, now we’re talking. The party was just getting started and fans started pouring in. Why yes, that is a pool with sight lines to home base. This is amazing.

My ticket to get into the building was only $13. (Crackhead from “Paid in full” voice) “All this for $13?!”

IMG_9141Giant baseball with a Corona filled beer jog on it? Check. There’s more booze here than was in Mike Goodson when he got a DWI the other night.

IMG_9130

A firework show regardless of how bad the team loses.IMG_9158Giant Jenga for drunk people to play? Check.

IMG_9145Add a shot of tequila to any beer for $5. Check. I tipped the bartender $2 and she gave it back and said “the tip is already included”.

IMG_9150Pool with a view of home plate? Check.

I seriously don’t know why more teams wouldn’t have late night after hours like this.

IMG_9163We were basically the three last people to leave the club that night. We decided to go back to the roof of the garage and grill the remaining meats. it might have been at least midnight.

Security came on a golf cart and made us pour a bottle of water on our coals. “You got your battery charged up bro?” Tony said to the security guard in regard to his ride. “Charged up” the guy said. He proved it as he followed us down the five floors and out.

Screen Shot 2013-05-18 at 1.34.36 PM Screen Shot 2013-05-18 at 1.34.20 PMAfter the game, Tony treated us to some amazing 24 hr Nicagaraguan restaurant around the corner from the stadium. I got some kind of grilled pork with a block of fried cheese on top and washed it down with a Dona beer. It was all delicious. The dinner tab for three of those trays and three imported beers was a cool $20.

Marlins Park is now one of my favorite stadiums in the country. When Tebow picks me and that other Tebow fan during the rapture, I hope where he takes us is somewhere like this.

Thanks again to Blake and Tony.

Other Things to do in Miami:

IMG_8986Go fishing.

IMG_9021Eat an omlette that puts Ed Hardy in its place.

IMG_8987Go to the corner where Rick Ross was shot at and crashed his car into.

IMG_9026Drink Austrian beer (I wish it was Goesser tho).

IMG_8924Eat a crazy burger with arepa buns at La Moon.

IMG_8916Watch Heat playoff games.

IMG_8980See Pirate ships next to yachts.

Join me next week as I go watch the Champions League Final on the big screen at Yankees Stadium.

Follow me on Twitter

IMG_1069

Feeling the Draft: The Life of a First Round Fan

 

IMG_0891

IMG_0894Welcome to the life of NFL fans trying to get into the 2013 NFL Draft. Unlike pretty much any sports game ever, you can not buy access or preferential treatment (unless you are a real juiced up baller and if so, God bless you). Instead the cost is a pound of your sanity is that you have to stand out side of Radio City all afternoon in an immobile line for a free ticket. The bracelets (which you use to get your ticket after waiting on line the next day) were being distributed at 9 pm. I figured I would get there before 5 pm and beat everyone leaving work.

Getting to the line at 5 meant I was only behind 400 other people. It sounds like a lot, but the line would eventually contain thousands of fans.

IMG_8465My partner on this adventure was the guy who made me a Jets fan (thanks, I’m sure being a Giants fan this last decade would have been terrible) @LolaNewYork.

Why am I wearing a Vietnamese rice paddy/vietcong hat? I brought a bunch back from Vietnam a few weeks ago for friends and was still in the process of distributing them. I had arrived in NYC by bus just before and had brought one for a friend. It looked less ridiculous to wear it than it did to carry it. Plus it’s funny when fans dress up for the Draft. The new NFL Draft slogan should be :

“The NFL Draft, we’re all here because we’re not all there”

IMG_0856

Big business saw this an opportunity to test the taste (and probably safety) of some new food products on this hungry, thirsty and weary bunch. The line was basically crop dusted with products they were trying to test out. Pepsi Next, some kind of disgusting honey mustard ruffle chip?

Now I know how monkeys at the L’Oreal testing lab feel like. If I grow a third arm soon, just know it was Pepsi Next related.

IMG_0860 No matter what teams fans were walking by, this fenced in, bored, possibly not sober mob of fans from all over let them have it.

Chargers fan walks by? “Chargers suck!”

Post man walks by? “USPS sucks man!”

You can imagine the response when a platoon of confident Dolphins fans come through?
IMG_0865Not everyone was held hostage by experimental foods, some people simply ordered pizza in the line.

“Make sure it’s not a bomb!” one person yelled. The Boston Marathon bombing had happened a week prior and the spectre of it loomed large over this concentrated mass of sports fans with nothing but time on their hands.

When you enter the line, your bag is inspected. This pizza was handed over the fence, obviating that security measure. Thank God it was just pizza, but everyone stayed jumpy.

IMG_8469

As time elapsed, people became more cavalier in their answers to nature’s call. This guy photo’d taking a leak was also drinking whisky and smoking weed (I really should have got a photo of the smoking) in line, so I guess he’s just bout that life.

IMG_0852IMG_8468As it got later and later, more reporters perused the line, trying to find the drunkest fan to look foolish on TV. It was like shooting fish in a barrel
IMG_0879Some network analysts started to show up and sign things. “The ’98 Vikings were my favorite team!” I yelled at Brian Billick.

Michael Irvin didn’t come as far down the line, but people near me were yelling stuff about cocaine towards him.

IMG_8481

We finally got into Radio City Music Hall at around 9.20 to receive the Holy Grail that was this bracelet. Fans now had to spend 24 hours being terrified of anything happening to this paper shackle on their wrist. That part kind of sucked.

They also gave us a slice of pizza and a NFL Draft 2013 collapsable stool. Do you know when this stool would have come in handy? About five hours ago.

IMG_0885 On my way out I bumped into Roger Goodell. “What happened to the missing 18 minutes of Spygate?” is what I wish I would have said. Maybe if I had time to prepare it could have been another “Frost/Nixon”, but it was more sudden than a Tavon Austin cut.

Instead I just shook his hand (while holding a half eaten slice of pizza and a collapsable stool in the other hand) and said something along the lines of “I’m glad there is a Jets fan in charge, you were a Jets fan growing up, right?”. to which he said he wasn’t a fan of any team. And that was the end.IMG_0897 The next day we hopped right back in the saddle and got back in the same line for a another wait, except this time there was some light at the end of the tunnel, we knew the draft started at 6 o’clock.IMG_0901 IMG_0906 IMG_0918 Radio City Music hall was pretty swank. It was funny seeing football fans milling around a theatre. The only time you see football and theatre mix is when Mark Sanchez is busy going to Broadway musicals instead of working hard.

IMG_0925On the way to our seats we got gift bags from the NFL.IMG_0934IMG_0927Is Lamar Odom the food and beverage director for Radio City Music Hall? There was only movie theatre-ish food and of course, no beer. I can understand the beer ban because it would be bad for business if a fan Geno Smith’d (unexpectedly fell) from the balcony.

IMG_0937 IMG_0952 The gift bags had deoderant in them. I’m assuming this is their way of saying “we know you have spent like eight of the past 24 hours in line and we know you didn’t take a shower since yesterday because you were afraid of your paper bracelet washing down the drain, you probably need this”.

IMG_0956They also came with an ear piece so you can listen to the broadcast of the draft. Now I feel like that old guy with the radio feed at the game.IMG_0970 They aired a segment with Joe Namath. This leads to about 5000 simultaneous alcoholic jokes. The running themes were that Namath was responsible for the lack of alcohol at the event. Either the NFL either banned alcohol at the event because they knew he was coming or he simply drank all the alcohol in the building before everyone else got in. Stay classy New York.IMG_0975 The 2013 NFL Draft blue chippers. They all would have a new team today except for one….IMG_0983 IMG_0991 Fans have good taste in Raiders theme music.IMG_0993 Is this “Weekend at Al’s Bernies IV”?IMG_1016“The Jets are on the clock” has become a sports punchline. I wish I could say it wasn’t true, but it is. The saddest part of the Jets Day Blunders is all the evidence that Jets fans knew much better than the Jets decision makers. You hear that fans chanting “We want Sapp!”, and you see the Jets fan give a post draft interview in 1983 where he says “we all wanted Marino, but I guess the Jets knew something we didn’t”. I

nstead of letting fans text in to vote on the song selection for their team, how about letting Jets fans vote on the pick? Can we vote on this idea?

IMG_1036

The difference between now and those years, this one has been characterized by analysts as a “flat draft”, meaning no one in the early first round stands out much more than anyone else. There was far from a consensus on who Jets fans wanted to take.

I have been banging the drum for Tavon Austin ever since the combine. In my eyes, the slot is the new sphere of warfare in the NFL. Until the last decade or so, going across the middle was about as safe as going across the 38th parallel in Korea, but rule changes and changes in public sentiment have turned that area into an autobahn. Austin is the perfect elixir for an offense that has more problems scoring than the 40 Year Old Virgin.

The Jets appear to have seen this too, unfortunately they banged the drum way too loud and made it clear that if you wanted Austin, you would have to cut in front of the Jets. Which is exactly what happened when the Rams enriched our division rival the Bills in a trade up to snag Austin a mere spot ahead of the Jets. I would love to play poker with Rex Ryan.

IMG_1023

The Jets pick ended up being Alabama cornerback Dee Milliner. He was regarded as the top cornerback in the draft but slipped due to injury concerns. Jets fans were pretty happy with this pick. Injury concerns never really seem to derail Jets draft picks, it’s always the team passing on someone uber talented to reach for a “safer” pick, so this passes the smell test to me so far.

The Jets second selection of the first round would raise more eyebrows as the Jets would select Missouri DT Sheldon Richardson, a move that no one saw coming.

I made a pact with myself that I would be stoic and not show emotion during the Jets pick (unless is was Austin, then I would have started acting like Maury told me that I’m not the Father). I did’t have strong enough opinions on the rest and didn’t want footage to haunt me if I reacted inappropriately. It must be nice being Peter King, where you can just make horrible predictions with no repercussions whatsoever (he guessed one out of the 32 draft picks correctly in his final mock draft released hours before the draft. Don’t worry though, his checks are still coming in)

IMG_1048

IMG_1051

Historically speaking, Giants fans have had to wait a lot longer than Jets fans for their teams to make their draft selections.

:(
IMG_8518

(insert your own joke about this being the closest Jets fans are going to be to a Lombardi trophy)

IMG_8520

IMG_1083After the Draft I caught up with TheJetsBlog.com‘s Brian Bassett and Corey Griffen to decompress after a long day with some cold ones at The West Way and some tacos on the corner of Avenue A and 2nd street. A nice finish to an exhaustingly rewarding 36 hours. TheJetsBlog.com ‘s esteemed Bent was with us in spirit.

To quote Geno Smith, “I’m not coming back to the draft tomorrow.” I would have liked to, but the line for tickets to day two has been long over.

Like Geno Smith, Brian and Corey were back at the draft the next day doing work for the Jets.

The first round of the NFL Draft is something all football fans should experience once, it’s not like the ticket price is prohibitive.

In the morning I woke up to a tweet from Corey, asking if I had seen myself on BustedCoverage.com. They did a write up on “Keeping it Real on the Line at the NFL Draft”. The last and largest photo was of myself. Their interpretation of this mass of dedicated fans was:
Screen Shot 2013-05-13 at 1.10.43 PM Screen Shot 2013-05-13 at 1.10.55 PM
Thanks for “keeping it so real” and dropping by to strafe some of the most dedicated NFL fans with insults. Maybe you can slow down on your speedwalk by the line next year actually get to see what dedicated sports fan life is like.

Screen Shot 2013-05-14 at 11.53.05 AM

If you were one if these “fame hungry, sweaty, ‘bro’ using, unmarried, sports radio calling, not getting laid” losers on line and wanted to chat with the author of the article, Joe Kinsey, have at it.

Follow me on Twitter

Screen Shot 2013-05-13 at 12.51.46 PM

Tail Gr8: The Charleston Riverdogs

Single A baseball isn’t a big draw, but that doesn’t stop fairweather baseball fans like myself (my main rooting interest is that the Red Sox lose) from invading The Charleston Riverdog’s Joseph P. Riley Park (AKA The Joe). My objective: Extreme Stadium Fooding.

Bill Murray is a part owner of the franchise and is known to show up at games and randomly serve at concession stands and do funny stuff. In the food world, theres a bigger celebrity at work: John Schumaker. He is the Food and Beverage director. He tours state fairs and other food events around the country and brings back what he likes. From there he comes up with culinary statements that are so bold that their gravity sucks sports snobs such as myself through The Joe’s turnstyles.

Unfortunately my camera was stolen out of my car on my drive down South. It was the second Canon G series that has been captured in the field under my command. All photos are from my iPhone.

IMG_8727IMG_8742

The lead off batter was the Pickledog. It’s a half a pickle, scooped out with a melon baller and refilled with cole slaw and a hotdog.

This is some outside of the box stuff right here. I’m a pickle junkie (pickleback anyone?), but there was a little too much pickle going on here and I couldn’t taste much else. The other problem was that I didn’t think it was a good enough pickle to be the dominant taste like that. The considerable time that I’ve spent around Jewish and Amish people has spoiled me, making me the pickle snob that you see before you today. Scooping it out more would have made this less of an issue.

With all that said, I would totally get another. Especially considering it’s reasonable $4.50 price tag.

Screen Shot 2013-05-13 at 8.49.18 AMTonight is “Thirsty Thursday, where Busch Light is only $1. When have you got beer from a stadium at frat house prices? A 22oz Budweiser is $6 which is a record in stadiums that I’ve been to (Hawks had $9 domestic 22′s, Patriots have $11 imported $24′s).

IMG_8729

The Medical University of South Carolina highlights healthy food options the ball park offers. I politely declined.IMG_8735

IMG_8744

Batting in the 3rd spot was the Home Wrecker. The scale of this meal was epic, it had everything, it was like when Sammy Sosa was on steroids AND had a corked bat.

A one foot (good quality) hotdog topped with over 15 condiments. Certain ones stood out like the pimento cheese and okra, while others were lost in the mix.

Screen Shot 2013-05-13 at 10.39.52 AM

It was $12 and came with a Home Wrecker trucker hat. Halo tee shirt not included.

IMG_8779I pitched around the duck (with plum sauce) and alligator (with remoulade) sausages. It’s tough intentionally walking two guys in a row but I was looking to get to someone else…

IMG_8762IMG_8767

IMG_8764

“Inside peanut butter, outside jellay”. The PBBJJ. Peanut butter on a burger sounds horrible but the trio of bacon, the sweet and the heat from the pepper jelly made everything work.

I could never figure out if they added extra jalapeno or if it was in the jelly, either way I could have used a little more as the peanut butter was a bit over powering. The bacon was better quality than I expected in a ball park and overall it was a very good experience.

The burger itself was standard sports stadium burger, bland, but the idea shines like Manu Ginobili’s bald spot in HD. I’m trying to convince @LolaNewYork to get him to try this out in the Whitman’s test kitchen, stay tuned.

I gave a bite to my 10 year old cousin JoJo. “I really liked that peanut butter burger” he later said. Isn’t passing the kid test what ball park food is all about?

IMG_8778I took a load off while JoJo dug in the sand box down the right field line. It’s cool that the bull pen is right there but as a parent I would worry about foul balls.

IMG_8755IMG_8759

In the bottom of the ninth inning I swung for the fences with the Guinness Milkshake. This was somethign I have attempted to create on my own before but could never get to work. The recipe here is vanilla ice cream, caramel syrup and a quarter of a bottle of Guinness Stout. Booze hounds will be disappointed because there’s no way to get drunk off of these. The Guinness gives a bitter bite at the end of a rich, choclatey shake.

I wasn’t super thrilled with the result (I’m one of those aforementioned booze hounds). My suggestion would be to add some Bailey’s or Kahlua, it would not only give it more of a punch, it would also improve on the flavor.

IMG_8781Greatness has been in this stadium before in the form of Josh Hamilton 13 years prior. The ideas have been All Star quality but some some of the execution and ingredients were playing closer Josh Hamiltons playing level since joining the Angels.

Overall it was enlightening, adventurous and most importantly, tasty. It boosts “The Joe” into the stratosphere of such legendary food stadiums as Mile High and the Barclay’s Center (the bar for sports food stadiums is very low).

If you want to try to recreate any of this stuff, knock yourself out, the recipes are pretty straight forward. Hit me up on Twitter for recipe help or food talk.

IMG_8927

Real Life Street Fighter II: Thai Boxing in Phuket

Welcome back to Lola Sports Talk. This is the second part to my Sports in Asia Tour. You can see my Saigon Heat game photo essay here.

photo

We’ve all seen Blood Sport, Enter the Dragon and other movies where fighters from around the World convene on a secluded island somewhere in Asia to compete in a clandestine, no holds barred tournament. It’s long been a dream of mine to attend one of these dark soriees, to breath air heavy with cigarette smoke and Southeast Asian humidity as two men fight it out in the coolest way possible.

Earlier this year, I found myself on the Island of Phuket, a tourist destination off the Western coast of Thailand. This was the perfect time to realize that dream.

Thailand is the Mecca of kickboxing (known as Thai boxing here). People come from all around the world to train here and there are kickboxing stadiums in most cities that give them a chance to show off their skills. These fights are big business in a tourist town like Phuket, which is ironically a sister city of Las Vegas.

 

IMG_8750

I wandered up to the Bangla Boxing Stadium, a roughly three story building with paper mache looking kick boxers on the side. It’s right off the main party area in the town, Bangla road, which is a strip of bars, sex shows and street food vendors that terminates at the Adaman Sea.

The MMA is cool but there’s a little too much grappling in speedos and Affliction-ish tee shirts for me. Boxing is fun to watch, but exciting matches have been fewer and further between and the once proud heavyweight division lumbers on to extinction. Adding kicks to boxing doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all.

In kickboxing, I envision an ballet of fist, elbow, knee and foot strikes, unencumbered by grappling or a Robert Guerreros Dad yelling “woman beater” repeatedly. Something like this.

IMG_8751

IMG_8755

IMG_8757

The best way to enjoy people kicking the hell out of each other is with a Chang, which is the official Thai beer of Lola Sports Talk (sorry Singha).

IMG_8802

IMG_8814Make sure to get your bets on the children fighting in. I’m assuming this is what it felt like to be in the background of the Street Fighter II levels.

IMG_8849

The child fight ended up in a pretty unspectacular decision. No “Battle Royale” stuff here.

IMG_8876

IMG_8883The adults on the other hand were going hard in the paint. The first adult fight ended with one combatant’s head being cradled by a referee after a high kick found its mark. It wouldn’t be the last probable concussion of the night.

IMG_8890

IMG_8899More money changing hands, more people getting their heads cradled by the referee.

IMG_8911

IMG_8915The earlier fights were all locals throwing down, but the event was about to take a more international flavor.

IMG_8943

IMG_8927

IMG_8944We had our first female fight of the night. The girl with the corn rows successfully audtitioned for the part of the villan in “Million Dollar Baby II” by beating the brakes off of this other girl.

IMG_8989

IMG_8992Next up was the “Looper” fight. Just like the movie, the younger version of this “Last Samurai”ish guy took on his future self.

IMG_9007

IMG_9002

IMG_9009The younger Looper had an effective, yet cruel game plan: he repeatedly targeted his older incarnation’s knees. The older, Skip Bayless looking guy didn’t make it through the first round. It’s tough to watch a knockout caused by a kick to the knees, but that’s what happened.

IMG_9013The conflicted look on a man’s face after kicking the last few bits of cartiledge out of his future self’s knees.

IMG_9020Either Dhani Jones is taping a new episode of his travel adventure show or this guy just looks like him.

IMG_9027

IMG_9030IMG_9031

“Dhani”‘s second trip to the canvas ends the match.

He was really angry after losing, hitting the mat and yelling. It’s OK man, you got off way easier than Williams in “Enter the Dragon”.

Lets take a look around and see what characters are in the crowd.

IMG_9099“Tanning Dad”.

IMG_8977Guy instagramming himself smoking a hookah in the second row.

Screen Shot 2013-04-04 at 5.17.13 AMAustralian haircut man.

Screen Shot 2013-04-04 at 5.32.12 AM

Guy who’s wife beater straps are actually thinner than 50 Cent’s back in the day.

IMG_9042I re upped on some Chang as just before the main event began.

IMG_8959

IMG_9040The final bout of the night pitted a local Thai fighter versus a Muslim fighter. I’m really sorry I didn’t get to see a sumo wrestler fight an African pygmy like Blood Sport, but it was still cool to see people from all over the World fighting each other.

IMG_9047IMG_9072IMG_9082IMG_9083

IMG_6198IMG_9112


It was a close match, but like so many fights before it, it ended with the ref holding the head of a dazed fighter. It is kind of like when you hold a newborn baby’s head because you know it’s neck muscles aren’t strong enough to hold it up straight. It’s pretty scary to see someone, who a few seconds ago was a fighting machine, in such a helpless state.

IMG_9114Hookah guy posed for a photo with the champ.

IMG_9116Tanning Dad (with white chacletas on) storms the ring like his alma matter just won the NCAA Tournament but is intercepted by security.

IMG_9117Tanning Dad is able to talk his way into a photo with the champ.

IMG_9122A multi national strikefest chuck full of gambling, knockouts and maybe a hadouken was what I expected coming into this event and I got almost everything I wanted.

I really wish Muy Thai kickboxing was more popular in the USA, I prefer this style of fighting over anything going on in La Vegas right now.

IMG_6263IMG_6186I left Phuket, but life goes on as there are fights every night.

Follow me on Twitter 

Other things to do in Phuket:

IMG_9159Go see James Bond Island. It was made famous by the movie “The Man with the Golden Gun”.

IMG_6145Go to the Swedish nightclub on Bangla road. It’s Sweden’s answer to the Jersey Shore. House music pumping, dolled up Swedish girls and even Swuidos (Swedish + Guido) jacked up on sweroids. I had to hightail it out of there after my friend Jorge drank 9 shots of tequila in 45 minutes and flicked a lit cigarette on a group of Swuidos. This is him hanging out of the cab on the escape from Lil Sweden.

IMG_6278Ride around and get it on a moped. If there is a more fun mode of transportation, I have yet to encounter it. Whipping a $5 a day135cc bike through jungle hills with spectacular views and then down to the beach is one of the more #Bauce things you can do with your time.